Building

We are building on
Spiderwebs

But it is working.

Slowly slowly
And, steps only this way, careful,
Careful,
This one falls
That one falls

But we are
Slowly
Slowly
Rising

We are building on
Volcanoes (here)

Round the bubbles
And sink holes
Careful here, this
Ground looks stable but it's
Just crust, really, building on red hot
Red hot

And we all get burnt
Battle scars painting songs on
Our faces

But it's working
Slowly
Slowly
We are rising

We are building on ghosts (here,
Comrades)
Careful of this ones
Face,
That ones mouth.

And we need to understand
What they need now,

To build them into our
Bricks like graffiti
So they can still sing
So they can still scream
And we can not forget

So we can see them clearly
And lay flowers before them and
Not pretend. Not pretend.

Because this one fell
And that one fell
(and tears, tears fell)

But we are building.
We are building.

On your birthday

On your birthday

I will take your daughter
(my mom)
To breakfast at Zoo Lake

She is Wonderful.
Did you know?

Sharp and soft
And engaging

AndKind
( a spreadingout kindofkind
That touches further than you
Can see)

She plaits the world into
Combinations
That no one else could see

(but everyone can recognise as Wondrous)

But,
She is sometimes inexplicably angry
And she is sometimes inexplicably sad.

On you birthday we will go to Zoo Lake
And feed ducks.

Dance

Life is easier
Where it is not real

Where the divide between the
Rich and the poor
Is continents

(No matter how
Much of the foundation
of Each the Other
Has provided)

Where the divide
Is seas and
you are not

Constantly
Constantly
Faced with stories of
Hell and Hope and Home

And face and face and faces
And each Some one, Some one's
father, daughter, some one's Hope,
Love.

Life is easier, when you
Can reach over the seas with
Your sterilized gloves and study
Us,

Sprinkling food parcels where you deem necessary
To perpertuate
The situation.

But you cannot hide forever.
Not all your seas,
Your visas
Your borders
Your 'non EU' arrivals halls
Will keep us out
We are coming in our
Millions

(More than in your nightmares)

We are coming
We are coming

(more than in your dreams)

We are coming to save you.

Because
we cannot just let you
Suffer, suffocate,
That's not our way.

You are our children,

No matter how hard you tried
To forget that in your Fancy New House

We are coming in our millions
To spoonfeed you
Our Hell
Home
Hope,

Until your ancestors wake in
Your feet and you
Can taste again and
Dance and Dance
And Dance

We are coming
In our millions
To Dance you into freedom
To Dance
You
Into Freedom

And dance
And dance
And dance

Bold and Bright

If I forget
(on purpose maybe)
To draw my curtains

People see a corner
Of bright yellow

People standing on a square of mountains,
A preacher, arms raised,
constantly redeeming,
Shacks built below a
Sagging telephone line and a tiny taxi
Perpetually disappearing into a tunnel.

They cannot see so far as my baobab tree,

My heart made of Historical Barbed Wire
Painful for whom it kept in
And out
Or my cementsolid, glasslight Cross
and Star
From new Bethesda (owlhouse
Where I first learnt the depths
Of light and
Dark)

On the opposite wall they see a
Smear of
Royal blue
Bright and bold and hopeful

They cannot see,
Maybe

My picture of a girl jumping, Flying out
Of demons mouths painted by
A dear dear friend
Who is just beginning to jump
Out of hers...

But they can see the sunflowers

Bold and bright
And easy yellow
Against the blue.


I hope this makes them smile.

Dreaming of pink

Rape is an amorphous
Monster

A gentleman dressed in a
Slick
Suit by day,
Recognised easily in
Public.

But as night falls
His shadows stretch into
Corners where

He is not recognised and the chill
He brings
Is not acknowledged and
The nightmares

That he breathes
Into your ear
Into my ear

Are not justified,
Cannot be labelled


(it is only his shadow that caught me
I cannot scream and cry
Because I invited him in)

But when I said no.
Again
And
Again

I didn't mean yes after another drink.

And didn't you notice?
That I was a dead weight?
That I was dreaming of pink while you,
While you were sweating on me
Stinking on me

Squirming in me

What part of that told you it was ok?
What part of that made me part of your game?


And when I came back to myself I didn't
Have the humanity let to scream but
I pushed you off me
And I cried


And I slept on a small corner of an unknown
Bed to sleep of the
Alcohol
(or whatever else you used as a lubricant)
Before I could cry my way home.


And
Then i had to stop crying because
It was only a shadow
That touched me

(so many women
Who have lived so much worse)


And "gentleman" rape is easily
Recognisable in the day

It's only at night that his shadows stretch
And his fingers clutch

It's his nightmares that crawl my skin
And his voice in my ear

Whispering

'but you said yes... You said yes'

(you)

i am raw

and you

(you are walking away)

Dimensions

I love your
Dimensions


The way you go
So far down deep sometimes

I hold my nose as I dive
in to fetch you.


The way you go so high
sometimes

I gather my balloons to float
to find you.


The way you go so Widebig sometimes

The whole world is in you, heavy and unwieldy,

Giving you indigestion, making you so grumpy.


The way you go
So thin
Sometimes


You turn sideways and disappear
And I have to speak
Nicely
To the wind so i can
See you again

Keep

There is a bar through the
Window. 
Thick. Solid

Dividing this side from that.

On the one side, a dove
Settle in a tree fork
Gentle grey against the gentle
Blue sky

Framed from this house
That always feels like its floating.

On the other there are burglarbars.

Straight
Regular
Trappings

Designed to keep
Keep
Keep.

On the one side is me.
And the other there is you.

(the dove has flown now, happy metaphor, 
And we lie here wordless)

Did you

Did you know
That you would love her when 
Her hair turned grey?

Did you know that 
When you turned 59
she would give you a baby lemon
Tree? Not symbolising
Anything. Just an unspoken
recognition of
Green and Growth.

Did you know she 
Would give your middle daughter
Her nose?
And you would give that daughter your habit
Of standing 
On tables?

Or was it just a leap, 
That day, 36 years back, of faith?
into humanity, 
Into God 
Into yourselves?

(I am asking. To inform
My leaps)

Sleep shape

We slept in heart shape:
Feet touching
And a world between our heads
Sometimes your arm
Sometimes mine
Trying to fill the gap

there was a country

Kwesukesukela
There was a country
disappearing.

lank lank gelede
kwakunesizwe

wat byna verdwyn het.

Once upon a time
Everydays flickered
in and out
of breathes in monotone.

Kwesukesukela,

Rocks became pebbles
To keep them from being small
and breathe was shot out
so people held it,
just to keep it.

Lank lank gelede
      (before new spaces were
fought) everydays traced
themselves
in whispertones

with silence facing the static

Once upon a time
anger was steeped in silence
and silence coloured everything
_____

Kwesukesukela there
was a country

That disappeared.